The Narcissist

I’m pretty sure we know at least one of them. I know that I have been surrounded by them since I was born, so I know a thing or two and what to look for. They are an interesting creature, so I decided to write about a particular one who stalks my family to this day and it’s already been six years. 

A bit of background information on the narc: Mum died whilst she was still with my now Husband. Her Father was shot due to money and drugs and her family now see her as just a burden, so you really can’t help but feel sorry for her. After all of the damage she tried to cause though, we no longer feel any form of remorse or sorrow for her, so you can see how she leaned on my Husband for her own comfort, when they were together, yet treated him like dirt (she admitted to this) and laughed at his goals. My Mother In Law even confronted her about how much she brought down her Son. Now, narc has nothing. THAT is karma at it’s finest.

See, the thing about narcissists is they think they’re in love with you, but that’s far from reality. They also want their minions to believe YOU are still inlove with them - far from it! The actual truth is the fact that they love what you did for them. They’re addicted to it, and once they finally lose something so great, they bring out their psycho, especially if their victims finally get the strength to leave them. Here you are trying to get rid of their stalking, whilst they’re there trying to bring down your happiness… ANY WAY THEY CAN.

Narcissists come in all forms. They are generally surrounded by minions, carefully handpicked, who they enjoy using to keep tabs on, and attacking, their victims. They will choose anyone who knows you, or used to know you, for instance: your Brother’s ex girlfriend, family or friends. You will get harassed online, at work… anywhere! Because they believe the narcissist and the evidence they created via fake chat or profile apps, as they are HIGHLY manipulative and excellent liars! The complete opposite of you. 

The narcissist in particular that I am speaking about is my husband’s ex-girlfriend. The things this woman did to try to bring my reputation down was disgusting (we really don’t like calling her a woman. She is a little girl, trapped in a woman’s body). She had befriended me back in 2016 when she found out that her ex-boyfriend and I were together. My Husband and I sang online and that’s how we met. I had to close that account and all of our memories because she just wouldn’t stop getting her minions to attack me and she also kept creating many fake profiles just to do this herself. I have been going to the same singing school since I was 14! She found that her ex was singing with some chick, so she started singing back in 2016 aswell, to let us know that she is there, watching, all the while, playing her mind games as if to say that the songs she sang were once hers and his - I don’t care, lol. We have our own WEDDING song. Anyway, little did I know that she was actually collecting bits and pieces of my personal information, my pictures, parts of my life just to integrate it with her own life and to eventually call me a copycat to her “minions.” This girl knew her exes passwords and hacked into his old laptop, where all of my information was kept. You see, she came into his house when she knew he wouldn’t be there and told his brother that she was there to collect HER laptop. ALL of my details were on his laptop - from my personals emails, pictures, my facebook and social media accounts - everything! I had no idea back then that anyone would even have the time to try to destroy someone’s life. It wasn’t until I logged into my email and saw that was a login form Sao Paulo, Brazil and other American IP addresses (obviously hidden IPs). We are in Australia and never even knew that you could hide your IP address! I had a Line chat account, where my Husband and I posted family and baby pictures. We sang on Smule together. Anything we sang about or posted, she would POST THE SAME THING to her Instagram, claiming I copy her. As I mentioned earlier, I had to shut down our old Smule accounts because she kept finding them and got her little minions to attack me. She messaged my followers from fake accounts and started spreading rumours about my Husband and I.  Little did she know that I ran a Heavy Metal Nightclub for many years in Melbourne with my ex and associates, so whenever I wore leather or sang a rock or metal song, she would post a picture of herself wearing leather and a rock or metal song. Whenever I sang a Disney song, she would post about Disney movies - little did she know that I have also sang in a play and my character was Princess Jasmine. She has never even come close to doing any of these two things, yet “I” am the copy cat. In fact, my idol is the Filipina great: Lea Salonga, whom voiced the original Mulan and Princess Jasmine. I have looked up to her as a small child and wanted to be a voice actor also. But ofcourse, the ex would claim that I copied her, liking Disney and all… wow! Whenever I posted about Church, she would suddenly be God fearing and quote the Bible. She even started to write a book (so she claims) called Ele, meaning Him in Portuguese. Our guess is it’s about “God,” with subliminal messages to me and my Husband… about my Husband. This was all part of her plan - to make me look like a “copy cat” to her minions. That wasn’t all! I started noticing profiles that used my Husband’s name or aliases, with things written in Portuguese, saying how they messed up and how they missed their ex. I KNOW they were fake because as my Husband SLEPT NEXT TO ME, she was busy posting under the profile she made of him, liking and commenting on different girls pictures. She even created a profile on Youtube under HIS name and posted a video of their old pictures together. My Husband politely asked for her to take it down and stop using his name and images and that they were OVER. She refused, so we had to get YouTube involved who took the profile and video down for us. I thought the video was cute - why NOT reminisce about good times… that are now gone? 🙂 The fake profiles didn’t stop there. They followed me on (my old) Quora, on Smule and anywhere else, mocking me, calling me names. She bombarded me with question on Quora, “How does it feel to be inferior to his ex?” or, “Why are you so envious of his ex girlfriend? Sucks to be inferior, huh?” I just laughed with my Husband. THAT RIGHT THERE, was a typical narc way of thinking, by the way: Superiority! When they in fact are the inferior. By the way, I am his Wife and the Mother his children, not just an ex. My Husband had even angrily told her this. We closed down whatever profiles we had and changed our numbers several times, as she kept editing his numbers into fake chat apps, showing to her minions how much my husband “still cares for her,” and how much she wants HIM gone. The only reason she had his new numbers was because he had to keep messaging her to LEAVE HIS FAMILY ALONE! 

So, a little background - HE KICKED HER OUT OF THE APARTMENT. His Mother already confirmed this, as she lived in the same building. He never looked back to her, never spoke to her though she would love for me to think that, but I know her silly games all too well.

My Mother in law admitted to me how she could not stand my Husband’s ex, how manipulative and evil she was and that she was surrounded by evil who helped her. I knew then that she spoke the truth, as I stopped speaking with her, thinking she still kept in contact with her. My Mother In Law absolutely hates her to the point where she can not even say her name. The ex also created fake profiles on my Mother’s Smule account to keep tabs on us with, which she now knows about, blocked and reported. My beautiful Mother in law (and my Husband) confided in me that, whilst she worked hard to put food on her children’s plates, his ex contacted Child Protective Services, stating that my Mother in law was neglecting her youngest child. My Mother is a good, hard working woman, who would do whatever it took to see her children happy and healthy! Ofcourse, the ex girlfriend denies doing this, but everyone knows who did it. Any competition she saw when it came to my Husband, she did what it took to bring them down, including his own Mother. My Husband’s family can not stand her and don’t trust her at all. They are so glad that my Husband found the strength and confidence within himself to let her go, praising how well he is doing now. She denies everything she’d ever done, it’s what narcs do. The last thing they want is to be found out, so they will go out of their way to change their stories, fake evidence, put all socials on private just to change and edit their “stories,” and posts and then, they will put everything back to public. This goes in circles for them… because they do not want to ever be caught in their web of lies!

They know that nobody would ever go near them if they found out who they truly were, so the pretend to be someone else whom has good qualities, or be a mix of different people, stealing a good quality from each of them, to build their own personality that they simply do not have. In reality, they live a fake life.

She created fake profiles, not just of my Husband and I, but even those she knew, to chat to herself with. She has many phones and phone numbers, so she’s able to chat to herself quite a bit. I found this out by doing a quick search and the alias name that she used to use was marked on the bottom of the picture of her bragging about how many phones and numbers she had. Instantly, I knew that’s one of the ways she was able to fake many chats and calls. On her profiles, she pretends to sing, but is really singing to a back up track with the artists. She then claims the video didn’t pick up the sound…

There have been too many thing to write about here. What I want to know is, have YOU ever dealt with a dangerous narcissist? If so, how did you manage to break free from them?

What worked for us is simply not caring what they do or say. They can’t stand the fact that they are being ignored and that you are no longer giving them fuel. Whoever is dealing with a narcissist, I wish you the very best. I know that they stick around for years on end, pretending that they don’t towards others, but letting ONLY YOU know that they will never leave. NEVER give them the pleasure of even thinking that they are hurting you! That’s the thing with this one: she actually believes I’m being hurt by it all. Meanwhile, we’re here, happily married with kids and living the life we should be living - especially my Husband. She did nothing but bring him down, also confirmed by many mouths! He couldn’t even complete any courses that he started because she would put him down. He stopped working because he was sick of her spending all of their money on things they simply could not afford and got angry at him when he no longer provided for her and she was forced to go back to work. She then twisted his story (yup, classic narc move) and called him lazy to anyone who would listen. To her, he was simply just something to lean on, emotionally, when she needed him. These days, he traveled overseas, now married, has his own children and family that he would DIE cor, regardless of what his ex says, he goes to a world class singing academy, completed his courses, works full time, bought his own vehicles and own home and is simply living the life he deserves… HAPPILY! 

That’s exactly why she started attacking ME to begin with. 

That’s why she started with the SMEAR CAMPAIGN, hurling abuse and rumours on her social media about me and my Husband, but hey, I’m married to the man of my dreams and he is a wonderful soul. She’s 35, lies about her age, has accomplished literally nothing in life, uses men for money, uses people for her own benefits, carefully handpicks anyone who will believe her stories about how unhappy my Husband and I are and how “crazy” I am - another typical narcissist move, by the way. They like to be the first to call someone crazy, just as she used to do with my Husband (Gaslighting).

So remember, they attack you because they can’t stand how much better off you are without them. They attack because YOU ARE better than them in every way, shape and form… THE TRUE INFERIOR… who WANT TO BE YOU because YOU TOOK the ONLY THING that put up with their madness… or you WERE the only one willing to put up with their madness.

Stay safe! Stay happy! 😉